Row, Row, Row Your Boss

After February’s office turnover, my Boss hired his wife. Boss Wife assists me in teacher recruitment. When I first got wind of this staff addition—four people work here, so wind travels fast—I started cruising Craigslist, hedging my employment bets. I couldn’t understand why you’d ever want to work alongside the person you go home to. [...]

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I’ve Got One Poem in My Pocket, and the Other One is Hailing a Taxi Cab

Happy New York City Poem in Your Pocket Day. I’m packing this. How about you?
Rosie O’Donald posted a 9/11 poem on her blog that’s quite moving. You can find it here.
Oh, and I have reason to believe my parents might be reading Trybecca, or at least Tuesday’s post. My father [...]

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Is That a Poem in Your Pocket or Are You Just Happy to See Me?

This is my thesis.

I keep it on the toilet. Much like the tattoo on my shoulder blade, I forget it’s there until I happen to turn my head around or somebody points it out.
This past December, I graduated from NYU with my MFA in poetry. I learned that iamb is not a brand of dog [...]

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Happy Administrative John McGrew Day

In the midst of all this American Apparel hooplah my online purchases arrived in the office. Yes, I bought the $12 terry cloth tube dress. It was on sale. I typically proceed with caution when I see “terry cloth” and “tube” used to describe clothing, but it turned out towel-rific! This time I [...]

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A Pennywhistle for Your Thoughts

Yesterday, over 3000 readers visited Trybecca as a result of Gawker’s Blogorrhea link to my American Apparel post—which, by the ironic way, featured an American Apparel ad alongside their teaser “American Apparel does dark things to women.”
One Gawker reader had this to say about my photograph:
Cap sleeves tread a fine line between “bicep-defining” [...]

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The Apple Doesn’t Fall Far From The Uprooted Tree

I’m from North Carolina but I don’t have much of an accent. My parents, however, do. Dogwalker David once likened my mother to Dustin Hoffman in Tootsie. When my mother calls, I can walk into the kitchen from the living room and leave the phone on the futon and still continue our conversation [...]

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American’t Apparel

Yesterday I went shopping at American Apparel. I’m a small girl but still I found that most of their clothes gave me ass shelf. Spandex is comfortable but maybe shouldn’t be a wardrobe staple. I bought a slate sheer ribbed shirred cap sleeve shirt (try saying that five times fast!) but couldn’t make up my [...]

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Carpenter, Panderer

I wish I could time a freakin’ celebrity on a freakin’ toilet but famous people aren’t seeing Gutenberg anymore. Even dead celebrities like Karen Carpenter can’t be bothered with showing up to will call. I mean, come on. Your ticket’s already been purchased. It’s just sitting there.

On second thought, I think Karen Carpenter died in [...]

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Johari

I’ve been interviewing a lot of Psychology Teachers for summer camp, which has prompted me to make a Johari. Johari sounds like a Robin Williams movie about a magical boardgame and jungle animals. It’s not. It’s really a grid of mapped adjectives. Created by Joseph Luft and Harry Ingham in 1955, a Johari [...]

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Dear John Letter

Dear John Mayer,
I don’t dislike you. There was even a time when “Why, Georgia” featured heavily on my mixes. But lately, I just can’t separate the song from the Simpson.
Did you have to date Jessica? Now I hear “Your Body Is a Wonderland” as a soundtrack to last week’s Australian Beach Getaway photo spread in [...]

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