Death of a Boob Man

OK, so I lived in New York City for six years and never once felt in danger. Except for that time the homeless man expectorated on my hair.

And now I live in Iowa, which should be safe, right? I mean, I figured the worst that could happen was some farmer overcharges me for organic kale. Turns out there’s a crazed University of Iowa Poli-Sci Professor on the loose. Arthur Miller, accused of inflating the grades of female students in exchange for eying their breasts, is hiding out in the wooded park mere yards from my house. He’s armed with a high-powered rifle. Which isn’t the most convincing way to exonerate yourself.

And wait — if you wanted to leverage your authority over failing freshman, wouldn’t you go all the way? Might as well just watch Girls Gone Wild. Maybe if he had lied and said he wrote The Crucible he could have gotten to second base.

Sure, sexual bartering is deplorable. So maybe he’s gone into the woods like Thoreau. To do some deep moral thinking…with ammunition?

Five local schools and a handful of University buildings were on lockdown for part of the week. Mr. Miller left a suicide note, but so far, neither he nor his high powered rifle has been found in Hickory Hill Park.

According to Rate My Professors , he wasn’t exactly disliked. Note the first comment: “We screw around for most of the class.” Uh-huh. I bet.

The original Arthur Miller. I bet Professor Miller wishes he could have taught Marilyn Monroe!

The original Arthur Miller. I bet Professor Miller wishes he could have taught Marilyn Monroe!


8 responses to “Death of a Boob Man

  1. Funny thoughts on a frightening situation.
    I enjoyed the read – thanks.

  2. Whose hand is that creeping in the photo? Look OUT AM!

  3. Whatever happened of innocent until proven guilty, Have none of you ever heard of innocent people being charged prosecuted tried etc, Only after begging for appeals etc Some lawyer believes the story of the REAL VICTIM and files an appeal. And finds evidence that the person tried n charged was completly innocent but the law lied so much to make their case strong, I amnot saying he was innocent but I also am not saying he was guilty, Why couldn’t he of been placed on leave. With his wages froze, and his private life kept closed until after his trial. But no peopl want to believe what they hear n think. My condolences go out to MR Millers family. I do not kow the man but I am sure many who are doing the name calling don’t know him either, And yes police do LIE I was falsely arrested once for some fabricated bs a woman who is in her late 50’s sent to the police,, When I tried to tell them it was fabricated, I even showed them how the font in email she sent them had been copied pasted n edited , Hell I didn’t even know the persons real name just a first name.They ignored me, they said she says we had met. I said that is a outright lie, please have her tell when and where, I am positive i can prove i wouldn’t know this person if they stood next to me and i would love to hear where we were supposed to have met, But no she told them I had child pornography on my computer and she had seen it, So I had a search warrant my computer taken accused of child porn etc and arrested first. Then it was discovered she lied, but does she get in trouble NO Do I get an apoogy from anyone NO, Yes one can sue but the police know no one wants to go through the bs to do that, and the woman who fabricated all this has nothing. Yeah after arrested I did my opwn investigation on this person. Only to fnd from people who knew her that she has a history of creating drama , and then says I stopped my Anti depressant meds And i do not do well whenI am off of them So this is my story sometimes some people are innocent, it is all in what you believe. My condolences to all victims

  4. Sorry Joe. I just thought it funny and I really don’t see that trybecca made any accusations, she just commented on the situation. I can understand (from your situation) how you would be sensitive to accusations, however. I’m sorry this happened to you (and others).

  5. Don I wasn’t attacking what you or anyone really said, I am venting. I have to say I lost alot of respect for the law enforcement over this situation. The point I want to make is Yes there are alot of good policemen and women out there, But the system has gotten so corrupted that the good are afraid to react to the things the bad do. And it all starts from above. It is time the good stop covering up for the bad. As a tax payer it really irriatates me to pay taxes so my civil rights can be violated into what some law officers waste time and money off of. There are unsolved murders thefts, drug rings etc out there, that there time should be devoted to. And this was really a kill the seized computer got stolen while in police custody. who knows for posting this they may come after me again with a new made up charge. If it never happened to you it is next to impossible to understand the fear they can put into you when innocent. First thing the attorney told me is they probably will not be very willing to drop charges because the county attorney is big on a high conviction percentage. See it is not about right or wrong It is about them always being right no matter what it takes. So charges dropped but the charge still shows up on public record and the search warrant is still public record. Put yourself in those shoes. It cause alot of emotional distress. Only peace I get is I know the truth and so do they. Hopefully karma handles it from here. yes I sound bitter, Because i am, hopefully I can soon move past this and stop wasting negative energy on this. Because at this point there is nothing more I can do but have learned from this. And never talk to the law without an attorney present. THEY ARE NOT YOUR FRIEND Even though I pay for them to protect me.

  6. Dear Trybecca and Joe,
    I just woke up to read in the NYT about Prof. Miller’s suicide. What a jolt that was. Art, as we students called him at the University of Michigan in 1979-80, was indeed a sexual predator. I had never discussed my experience with anyone but my husband before now.

    I don’t know if I was the only one, but Prof. Miller was intimidating young girls into sexual submission back at the UofM. Makes me wonder if that is why he left Michigan. He had a much more high profile job running the world reknowned Center for Social Research prior to 1985 when he joined Iowa. If he did leave Michigan due to accusations, certainly Iowa knew about his past. Shame on Iowa if this is the case.

    I was out of the country when all of this unravelled, so this is the first I am hearing of it.

    Usually where there is smoke, there is indeed fire.

  7. hahahahahahhhhhhhhhhhaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!

    yall are all wack

  8. Sorry about your bad experiences, Joe. I think you’d like my grandpa. He’s a retired cop, and apparently he was pretty much the only really level-headed guy in their precinct, keepin’ the other cops from violating the rights of the accused. We really need more cops like him out there, we really are paying for vigilantes.

    Oh, and no, he won’t be rejoining the force any time soon. Poor guy has emphysema from smoking. So two lessons in one, I guess.

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